"With McDonald's Corp. stock taking so many bad hits lately, the company has taken to drastic measures in hopes of alleviating the pressures of health-conscious consumers who are steadily veering away from their sub-standard menu offerings.

In McD's latest attempt to revitalize the ailing restaurant chain, executive chefs at McDonald's Corporate have retained the services of the one man who might be able to bring new life to their next hamburger product. Well, at the very least, this single man will be able to beat several hamburglars senseless in the process. He is Mike Tyson.

Many undercover agents have given their very lives to obtain this exclusive photograph of the mad science occurring behind McDonald's doors at their Food Science Development Center. The photograph below reveals the very core of the McDonald's empire, Ronald McDonald, (wearing a standard-issue Insane Clown Scientist yellow lab coat) looking on as former heavyweight champion "Iron" Mike Tyson erects what he acknowledges as the future of the McDonald's Corporation. Massive golden arches made entirely of McDonald meat.

Behold the power of Food Science! Introducing McDonald's new Beefcake Arches! As Eric Cartman would proclaim... "Beefcake! ... beefcake!" Who better to create arches made of McD beef patties than the infamous "Iron" Mike Tyson. And hey, if you don't like how this new product tastes? Well, let's just say I hope you don't meet up with Iron Mike in a dark alley with his insane clown posse accomplice, Ronald."

(* for those who believe anything they read, this post is merely poking a bit of fun at good ol' mega-goliath corporation known as McDonald's. They are not really releasing a Beefcake Arches menu product. Well, at least not yet. Faces of the innocent have been blurred to protect their identity, because I can understand why no one would want to be in that photograph in the first place.)

Caught the Year of the Rabbit show at the Pound in San Francisco. It was a few nights ago, but I am going back in time with the magic of web posting to give a quick review of what I thought of the show and the band.

First off, the Pound is an interesting venue -- to say the least. It is off the beaten path in SF, near what seems to be an industrial section near water. The setup is alright, although, to be safe, I'd stay far away from the kitchen and/or consumption of the food offered for sale there. Paul's previous band, The Poison Apples, played the same venue a few years back. Place hasn't changed at all.

The opening bands, who I cannot name off hand (and it isn't worth my time to even bother looking up their names), were just not worth seeing. I hear a lot of the people just waited outside, but I sat it out though and listened through every set. Year of the Rabbit (YOTR) finally came on stage and definitely showed their higher level of skill. Ken Andrews, of Failure fame, was really great -- even though Paul mentioned to me later that Ken had a really bad cold and was really low on energy the whole night. Speaking of Paul, he spent about 99% of our time there backstage and we hardly ever saw him. Nothing wrong with getting some quality time in with Ken Andrews and the gang, I say.

I can't wait for Analogue to start hitting tour dates, so I can catch some shows like this one. YOTR is great and all... but I'd much rather see Analogue live, personally. The new Analogue website should be up and running within the next couple weeks; I have the pleasure of working on part of it and am looking forward to seeing it in action when the new Analogue EP is released.